2005-05-26 - 2:13 p.m.
This is a painful entry to write. There are several couples in my circle of friends of are struggling right now. I don't know the whole story and I don't want to know. Unless they ask for my help I am staying out of it. That's hard for me because I want to be in the middle of everything. But as Steve said in the season finale of the third season of Sex and the City, "Only you and I know what happens between you and I."
I just don't get it though. I don't get how two loving, intelligent, wonderful people who are loving, intelligent and wonderful to me, stop being loving, intelligent and wonderful to each other. Mr. activision and I have had our rough spots for sure. But for some reason, whether it be temperment, genetics, or fate, our conflicts stay within the argument. Things may come up again, but we know how to treat each other on a daily basis.
I don't get how people who love each other stop being nice to each other. I'm kind of committed to being nice to the people I love. It's not as if I don't have my bad days but I do feel bad when I've hurt someone, whatever the reason. I grew up with a father who would try and tear me down, saying "I'm only saying this because I love you." No. You're saying it because you can't control your emotions. And this is the same person who GAVE is car to my cousin when he got accepted into medical school. I hate that principle where loving someone gives you the right to be cruel to them. That's bullshit.
I was talking with Pauline the other day about how you need to have the same stndards from significant others that do you for your close friends. We would never put up with nasty behavior from our friends. We'd call them out on it and if they kept doing it, we'd stopp being friends with them. But for the people we live with, somehow that gives us the right to be mean to each other? I don't think so.
This relationship stuff happening around me is hard because I want them to treat each other right. I want them to realize why they came together. I am scared to death of a possible breakup because I love them both so much. Most of all, I want them to be nice to each other.
